I left mass yesterday wondering if I had already royally screwed up Lent. The gospel reading talked to the behaviors of Christians during times of prayer, fasting and alms-giving – which is more or less what Lent is all about.
Matthew specifically says, “And when you pray, you must not be like the hypocrites; for they love to stand and pray in the synagogues and at the street corners, that they may be seen by men. Truly, I say to you, they have received their reward. But when you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you.”
So, isn’t writing a blog about your experiences attending daily mass during Lent 100% against everything this says? I spent some time yesterday afternoon and last night thinking about it. Why really am I doing this? Am I writing to show people I’m a good person – a good Catholic? Am I guilty of a “look at me!” move?
There were other parts of mass that stood out. When I shared with a co-worker that I would be blogging about my Lenten journey, he asked, “Are you going to write about the car ride to and from church?” It was his typical satirical way and I was amused – but when Bishop Lennon was giving his homily yesterday, he said, “It’s not the kind of journey where you get in the car and go somewhere… it’s a spiritual journey to get closer to God.”
So, if that is in fact why I’m doing this – to get closer to God – then I think I’m okay.